{"product_id":"mo-rozzy-i-need-a-celestial-discharge-tee","title":"MO - Rozzy \"I need a Celestial Discharge\" Tee","description":"\u003cp data-start=\"29\" data-end=\"173\"\u003eSome medical visits are routine. Some require a nurse, a doctor, an angry old woman, and an explanation nobody in the room is qualified to give.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"175\" data-end=\"506\"\u003eThis vintage-style tee features a distressed, old-school exam room scene with a nurse delivering the line: \u003cstrong data-start=\"282\" data-end=\"317\"\u003e“I need a celestial discharge.”\u003c\/strong\u003e Is it medical? Is it spiritual? Is it something insurance definitely will not cover? Hard to say. But it has the exact kind of weird, inappropriate charm that belongs in the Rozzie’s Line.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"508\" data-end=\"662\"\u003ePerfect for anyone who enjoys dark humor, retro artwork, awkward medical energy, and saying something so confusing people stop asking follow-up questions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"687\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"687\"\u003eWhy you’ll love it:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"689\" data-end=\"894\"\u003eVintage illustrated design with distressed edges\u003cbr data-start=\"737\" data-end=\"740\"\u003eSoft, comfortable everyday wear\u003cbr data-start=\"771\" data-end=\"774\"\u003eGreat conversation starter, especially with people who should know better\u003cbr data-start=\"847\" data-end=\"850\"\u003ePart of the Mildly Offensive Rozzie’s Line\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"896\" data-end=\"990\" data-is-last-node=\"\" data-is-only-node=\"\"\u003eWear it when you want to look wholesome from across the room and deeply questionable up close.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width: 360px;\"\u003e\n\u003cthead\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"padding: 10px;\"\u003e \u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color: #000000; font-weight: 500; text-align: left; font-size: 15px; padding: 10px;\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/thead\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eWidth, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e16.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e18.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e20.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e22.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e24.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e26.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eLength, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e27.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e28.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e29.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e30.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e31.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e32.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e33.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e34.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSleeve length, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e8.60\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e8.90\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.20\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e9.70\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.00\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.40\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e10.80\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003eSize tolerance, in\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding: 10px; color: #525252; font-size: 15px; border-top: 1px solid #ededed; word-break: break-word;\"\u003e1.50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"896\" data-end=\"990\" data-is-last-node=\"\" data-is-only-node=\"\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEU representative\u003c\/strong\u003e: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eProduct information\u003c\/strong\u003e: Bella+Canvas 3001, 2 year warranty in EU and Northern Ireland as per Directive 1999\/44\/EC\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWarnings, Hazard\u003c\/strong\u003e: For adults, Blank product sourced from Honduras\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare instructions\u003c\/strong\u003e: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: low heat, Iron, steam or dry: medium heat, Do not dryclean\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"XS \/ Black","offer_id":44167443513387,"sku":"86487730911169499556","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Black","offer_id":44167443546155,"sku":"16344924843886006817","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Dark Grey Heather","offer_id":44167443578923,"sku":"16238160145437111299","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ Red","offer_id":44167443611691,"sku":"10748733383598585092","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"S \/ White","offer_id":44167443644459,"sku":"19241885143151097376","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Black","offer_id":44167443677227,"sku":"39523151786594198127","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Dark Grey Heather","offer_id":44167443709995,"sku":"12399934429113918914","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ Red","offer_id":44167443742763,"sku":"37428755430524010544","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"M \/ White","offer_id":44167443775531,"sku":"17991612001313242640","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Black","offer_id":44167443808299,"sku":"21203407906737852241","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Dark Grey Heather","offer_id":44167443841067,"sku":"29511961368909231543","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ Red","offer_id":44167443873835,"sku":"21192703804845194367","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"L \/ White","offer_id":44167443906603,"sku":"14298471544106109984","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Black","offer_id":44167443939371,"sku":"10155520796318235875","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Dark Grey Heather","offer_id":44167443972139,"sku":"36977372584669328593","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ Red","offer_id":44167444004907,"sku":"25108443591459516615","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"XL \/ White","offer_id":44167444037675,"sku":"86349820082323775372","price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Black","offer_id":44167444070443,"sku":"22274151367780737600","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Dark Grey Heather","offer_id":44167444103211,"sku":"27821157636782546736","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ Red","offer_id":44167444135979,"sku":"28433905256926879298","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"2XL \/ White","offer_id":44167444168747,"sku":"12568118289214702051","price":38.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ Black","offer_id":44167444201515,"sku":"22557675131638611221","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"3XL \/ White","offer_id":44167444234283,"sku":"21538178491491191105","price":40.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"4XL \/ Black","offer_id":44167444267051,"sku":"19556994252432706227","price":45.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0686\/2418\/7435\/files\/7047288906210139956_2048.jpg?v=1780788813","url":"https:\/\/mildlyoffensiveapparel.com\/products\/mo-rozzy-i-need-a-celestial-discharge-tee","provider":"Mildly Offensive Apparel","version":"1.0","type":"link"}